It has been said, ‘I am so laid back I am practically horizontal’ (thanks Dad) he was onto something there though. I was also once described by a young person, I had been working with as ‘Jessica: she just floats’ at the time I was thought it was cool to float and was happy to hear this but now days I am not so sure.
I love to joke in class, when we arrive at Savasana that this is the bit we come to yoga for. This was true for me once, I went to yoga classes to relax, I enjoyed dropping out of my mind into my body.
I have done many things with the same purpose of disasociating from reality, not always negative. It started with day dreaming, mutated into escaping, avoiding feelings, sensations, consequences, that were real life.
I have had a yoga practice on and off since 2000, in 2010 it started to change, I was learning to handstand and arm balance, I went to regular classes and practiced with the same teachers and people (shout out to #eastendkula massive).
New things started to happen: emotional releases and messages would come to me during and after class.
It got deeper and more energic and you could say firery these messages got clearer and it became less likely that I would drop out and dissasoicate from my life. The fire that I was creating was starting to boil the placid water I had been floating in.
This was good but hard as it turned out to be a rocky and turbulant transformation.
When I look back now I see I was churning it up the water (see Shiva’s Blue Throat) and whatever came to the top got thrown up into the flames and burnt away (friends, jobs, ‘old patterns that no longer served me’). The conditioning I had been living with that included not saying what I thought, not standing my ground, not being open to the possibility I could do anything I wanted, was evaporating in the heat and lord (shiva) knows what other sub-concious habits went along with it.
Without this fire in my practice I would not be writing this today. If I am ever unsure of something, I know the place to go, to listen and to act from. Yoga is like magic in that way, it can’t be undone. This aspect is meditation and it all started to come more naturally when my meditation practice got really regular, like daily.
So now I teach from this place, in my class you will have a good, safe and challenging ‘workout’. Listen closer and after a while, as we charge that fire in your heart via your body, you might find it hugely relaxing and float away like I still do sometimes, or you might find you start to get a deeper and more connected relationship with the truth.
I have practiced and studied with teachers that share this focus. Since 2013 I have been training to teach yoga (somewhat in denial to start with and something that will never end) I have studied intensively with Leila Sadeghee and in 2014 began my teahcer training with her and Tara Judelle. I am accredited as a 200 hours qualified Yoga teacher with Yoga Alliance UK, and studied therapeutics with Ross Rayburn, I am studying Restorative Yoga. I have studied meditation with Sally Kempton and yoga mythology and fearlessness with SIanna Sherman. am part of a whole tribe of like hearted yogis called the European Yogi Nomads. I am part of a group of London based teachers that are after continuous proffessional development, supported and mentored by Bridget Luff and Leila Sadghee. Alongside these teachers, in honour and service of the journey that brought me to this place I am a regular participant and occasional teacher on the Practices of Freedom and Wellbeing Immersion. I am co-founder of 108 London.
My classes are uplifted and strengthening, soulful and grounding. Regular attendence with me will not just upshift your yoga practice but it will bring you into a deeper relationship with your soul/heart. Re-charge your energy or wring out the tension in your body and mind lets practice connecting with the soul and feel into our deepest hearts desires.